Kitty Concerto

I’m starting a movement.  

Nope, I don’t have a button, but I think I might check in with this lovely lady to create one for me if she’s available.

It’s called F*ck This Fridays.  

Why?  Because I’ve pretty much have had enough outta life today and decided to dedicate a full day to my verbal diarrhea to share with all of you lovelies out there in the blogoshere.  And I’m hoping that eventually this will catch on like the std your ex-boyfriend gave you in the back of his Ford Ranger that smelled like stale cigarettes and Wendy’s fries.  

I’m hoping that eventually you will also share and commiserate because ….. Misery Loves Company.  On Fridays, if you so choose to participate, you can grab a button (when it’s created) and link back here so I can advertise you and come to your place and give you virtual hugs.  

The thing is, I don’t want to continue with my immature bitchiness all week, but rather have a concentrated version on just a single day of the week.  Like grape juice.  Should drink often for your heart, but too much will stain your teeth.

And no, I’m not angry/depressed/bitter/sad/etc because the paint fumes are making me high (although they really are), I actually have real reasons.  And speaking the fumes, as I’m typing this at nearly 1:00 am, I’m in our guest bedroom where we are repainting it.  Yet another room we are painting.  Well tonight Mr. Cat is doing all the work and I’m supervising.  HA!  He got screwed!  

But I digress…..

So please listen to me bitch and moan and groan, then share.  It could be serious, it could be frivolous.  The point is having the need to get it off your chest.  We are not here to judge, we are here to support.

Yes, I know that some of you use your whole blog to do this everyday.  Good for you.  I’m proud that you can be so free.  But I don’t, and I don’t want this to turn into my own pity party.  That somehow makes me feel even worse.  So I’m sticking to a day for a while.

So to my fellow whiners, if you were here, we’d be sitting around my kitchen table gobbling up chocolate chip cookies telling ourselves that the calories don’t count when your depressed.  See!  You are all already great friends.  *Muah*  Makes me feel better. 

So on with the show!

Well, speaking of shows…… I received the cast list and my name was on it…. just not a part that was in the freak’n show!  No, I kid you not.  I combed through my script and realized that I may have a name, but I have no lines or a solo song.  Wow.  

I’m a professional singer.  There I said it.  Granted, I’m not a very famous singer or anything, but professional nonetheless.  And I couldn’t get a role in a musical production with my church.  I may be 29 years old (dammit–only a couple of months till 30!), but I still cried and had a tantrum with my poor husband as witness.  Okay, okay it’s not as bad as it sounds.  But after all I’ve been through recently, this was really a blow to my self-esteem.  When you put yourself out there in an artistic fashion, its soul crushing when your personally rejected.

I knew Hollywood politics were rough, but apparently church politics can be even more brutal.  And since I’m new, I’m the new one to get kicked in the nuts.

So let’s recap the past few months for me, shall we????

•  I had a miscarriage.  
• One of my best friends and I got into a huge fight, ironically kick started by this blog, and now we are no longer speaking to each other.  
• I had to drop out of my acting school, the one that I had waited for a year to come back too, because of my number one.
• I haven’t lost the weight from my pregnancy.  Granted it’s not a lot, but I’m not a big person, so a lot is actually huge.  Did ya catch all that?
• My bewbs that had grown a full cup size, are now almost back to my original concave size.
• Ranni, our persian cat, is still pissing in places where she shouldn’t be, like on ALL.THE.FLOORS.
• In a mere matter of weeks, I will be attending my BIL’s daughter’s first birthday party and have to endure my BIL and his wife.  This is in my opinion, the closest to hell on earth.  These people are completely self absorbed, high maintenance, ignorant and insensitive.  I’m just betting that one of those two will inadvertently open up their big mouths and say some jackass comment.  I’m gearing up for the fight (and the many posts about the past and why I have such a negative view about them.  Trust me on this.  It’s warranted).
• My house is in a complete disaster because of all the home improvements we are doing.
• My in laws are coming to visit in a matter of days. (actually, them visiting isn’t so bad, it’s them visiting while our house is in disarray).

I think that pretty much sums things up.  The only thing that could make it worse is if my dog died.  Thank goodness I don’t have a dog (don’t worry dog lovers, I love them too!).  And just writing that sentence just gave me a heap of guilt.  Sure, just throw that on my stack of “why I hate me today” pile.

Gah…. I’m sick of myself right now.

Off to eat a ton of chocolate.  And ice cream.  Oh yeah….

—–Edited——-

I forgot to mention in my shit list that I recently found out that my grandmother is dying.  All the meds that she takes for her rheumatoid arthritis has cause her kidneys to shut down almost to the point of failure.  She will have to go for dialysis three times a week, and there really is no cure.  This is of course if she decides that she will go in for treatment at all.  We are all not sure.  And my mother is about to have a complete breakdown because of it.

Now I feel like a complete self absorbed pile of crap because I forgot about something serious like THAT.  

I’m such a bitch.